Yelling and screaming would never work for me. It’s not in my character (unless I’m driving), and I can’t do “phony” in the classroom. Kids see straight through it.

I guess I was lucky that I learned this lesson fairly early in my career, and I came about it more as a defense mechanism than anything else. I knew I’d never be able to rule with an iron hand, so I turned to creating (or trying to create) fun and interesting activities and projects (I even tried to keep the lectures fun by illustrating the lives of Geoffrey Chaucer and Henry VIII in stick figure form using nothing but MS Paint, my mouse, and a lot of Mountain Dew – crude as hell, but they’re the only times I’ve gotten applause after what is essentially a history lecture).

It’s not a laff-a-minute in my classes, but I do like to keep the smiles and laughs coming, both from me and my students. When it works, it sets a really nice tone that allows for a very collaborative environment, and my kids respond well to that sense of “we’re all in this together.”

One of the nicest compliments I ever got was from a student who told me, “You’d make a good cartoon character” (though I’m still not sure if she meant I was really animated or just one-dimensional).

I wrote something similar, although not quite as nicely written, last week after starting my second year. I just felt a great change in the atmosphere of my classroom and I think this has a great deal to do with it.

When I got my first ‘part-time’ teaching job in Rice Lake, WI, I was taking over midyear from another part time teacher. When I was interviewed they were concerned that this group of kids had gotten used to the discipline style of the other teacher and that was largely based on the fact that the guy was huge, tall and imposing. That description couldn’t have been farther than the desciption of me… I was 5’3″ tall and getting yelled at in study hall when I tried to help some students with their work (mistaken for a middle schooler). Maybe it was because of that situation that I realized that control of a classroom by force is a farce. It is my job to get them onboard with the learning program, not forcibly control the situation. I make the classroom about the students and not so much about me. It is a challenge some years when I have a tough crowd, but the best classes are those that settle in for the learning in a cooperative, collaborative manner. The other thing they know is that I treat them as respectfully as any other person that walks through the door, including the principal and superintendent of schools. It’s the little things…

Unfortunately I’m not sure how to describe that release to myself, much less anyone else.

I think you just did.

Discipline is something that you can not learn in a classroom as a student, it is only something that eventually comes as a teacher in a classroom. Don’t beat yourself up for not realizing this out of the gate, you probably had so many people telling you need that perfect pyramid. (yuck!) I wished someone took me aside and told me it was going to be super hard and you will not learn classroom management until you have done it, done it again, messed it up and tried again and then did it one more time. Then what works changes, what works with one student doesn’t work with the other.

I know in most cases the talk outside or the low voice to correct behavior is the most humane, however it does not always work – especially in the school I taught at for five years. This was a school were niceness is confused with weakness. At this school I never called home (mainly because no one cared what I had to say) and I NEVER held a detention because it seems like more of a punishment for me! Instead I created boundaries of how I will be treated and what is acceptable in the classroom. This kills me to admit but it works with middle schoolers and into high school, I over react, I use drama to reinforce these boundaries. It makes the infraction into a joke instead of me having to yell or take them aside and take up more time. A wide eyed loud, “OH YOU DID NOT!” usually got the “my bad Ms. Hull” response and then we got back to business. But there were times when I have gripped kids up or bent them over my desk and whispered in their ear, “if you ever throw anything else in my classroom again I will stick my foot so far up your ass it will come out your mouth.” This little bit of crazy in that school kept them guessing and also made them realize I will do what it takes to keep my classroom safe.

What it this creates is a space between the boundaries where it is okay to have fun, be silly, be serious about work, or put yourself out there with your own opinions. Students know they are safe in my classroom, I am the adult in control in every situation. This makes it possible to hand the classroom over to them and they begin to police each other, I don’t even have to do it. You know that you have this working when a look in their direction with a raised eyebrow corrects behavior. I am still working on this and have yet to perfect it. I have made BIG mistakes!

In my new school I come on too strong and look like a bully. I am trying to learn the balance at my new school. I will never forget making kids jump in there seats with a “YO!”. This made me feel bad, I don’t want to scare kids to death.

At the other end of this spectrum, each child knows that when they are in my care or my classroom, they are “my” child and I will do what I can to protect them and have a good experience. So underneath the gruff no nonsense they know I am a softy that has their best interests at heart.

Oh yeah, also an apology when I messed up in the past goes a LONG LONG way with kids.

Sorry this got so long! I think about balance and boundaries and powerful lessons all the time.

If you aren’t careful, Dan… you’re going to become one of those progressive teachers… :)